Who I met when I took Ayahuasca, pt. 1

Flash. Wisp. Twang. How do you even describe this stuff?? Am I enlightened yet? Pretty shapes. Musical notes in my head. Tingles. Heaviness. Where is he? Take me to him!

Here I am, lying on a bare mattress in the middle of the Costa Rican jungle, mosquitos by the ears, keeping me grounded. You have no idea how important this is, what it took to get here.

Roughly two months ago, my family members agreed to look after my 10-year-old son at home in Auckland, New Zealand, so that I could make the 48-hours plus expedition across 3 flight providers and 2 continents to end up in a rural, non-touristy part of Central America, where plant medicine ceremonies are culturally celebrated & acknowledged as having psychosocial value amongst humanity. Extraordinary!

Mathéo was a French expat who lived beautifully off the land, hidden in mountainous jungle in a series of rustic huts sprawling across the thicket landscape, accompanied in this lifestyle by his Costa Rican wife & pre-teen daughter. Mathéo’s history with Ayahuasca spanned around 20 years, during which he lovingly tended to & nurtured many varieties of the Ayahuasca plant, forming a strong connection to the plant’s energies & mission with humanity.

Once I had been dropped to the gate of the jungle fortress, I followed Mathéo up what seemed to be endless stone stairs as we climbed higher & higher through the jungle sea of tangle, passing a meditation platform, then little bamboo huts. I followed quietly. On. And on. And on.

Steady breathing through the ol’ lungs. Puff. Breathe out. Blow through circled lips, slowly. Now panting. Slow the breath. Slow the breath. There we go. I refused to succumb to the childish stereotype by asking the question, “Are we there yet?” I thought it to myself though.

Finally, a small clearing. Whew! Not a second too soon! There stood, a thatched roof supported by ornately painted pillars of nature scenes & jungle animals intertwined with psychedelia. On one side, a raised platform with two large mattresses indicated where the psychonauts would rest the body to take their spiritual journeys. On the other side, Mathéo’s ceremonial alter & seat were ready.

First we sat & made conversation. Nerves were to be eased. This was a big deal & we didn’t need nerves right now; we needed to be calm. I had invested lots of savings to be here on 1 January 2023, about to undergo my first ever Ayahuasca journey. Will I meet him? Will I meet my own demons? What am I doing?? Blessings happened. The space was smudged. Prayers were said. Here. We. Go.